Diary of a Nobody
George & Weedon Grossmith
First published (in book form) 1892
Introduction by Mr. Charles Pooter
Why should I not publish my diary? I have often seen reminiscences of
people I have never even heard of, and I fail to see — because I do not
happen to be a 'Somebody' — why my diary should not be interesting.
My only regret is that I did not commence it when I was a youth.
Charles Pooter
The Laurels,
Brickfield Terrace,

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Chapter Contents
Chapter 1 (April 3rd - April 8th)
We settle down in our new home, and I resolve to keep a diary • Tradesmen trouble us a bit, so does the scraper • The curate calls and pays me a great compliment

Chapter 2 (April 9th - April 18th)
Tradesmen and the scraper still troublesome • Gowing rather tiresome with his complaints of paint • I make one of the best jokes in my life • Delights of gardening • Mr Stillbrook, Gowing, Cummings, and I have a little misunderstanding • Sarah makes me look a fool before Cummings

Chapter 3 (April 19th - April 29th)
A conversation with Mr Merton on society • Mr and Mrs James, of Sutton, come up • A miserable evening at the Tank Theatre • Experiments with enamel paint • I make another good joke; but Gowing and Cummings are unnecessarily offended • I paint the bath red, with unexpected results

Chapter 4 (April 30th - May 7th)
The Ball at the Mansion House

Chapter 5 (May 8th - August 3rd)
After the Mansion House Ball • Carrie offended • Gowing also offended • A pleasant party at the Cummings' • Mr Franching, of Peckham, visits us

Chapter 6 (August 4th - August 20th)
The unexpected arrival of of our son, Willie Lupin Pooter

Chapter 7 (August 22nd - November 3rd)
Home again • Can get nothing for Lupin • Mrs's James's influence on Carrie • Next-door neighbours are a little troublesome • Someone tampers with my diary • Got a place for Lupin • Lupin startles us with an announcement

Chapter 8 (November 5th - November 14th)
Daisy Mutlar sole topic of conversation • Lupin's new berth • Fireworks at the Cummings' • The 'Holloway Comedians' • Sarah quarrels with the charwoman • Lupin's uncalled-for interference • Am introduced to Daisy Mutlar • We decide to give a party in Daisy Mutlar's honour

Chapter 9 (November 15th)
Our first important party • Old friends and new friends • Gowing is a little annoying; but his friend, Mr Stillbrook, turns out to be quite amusing • Inopportune arrival of Mr Perkupp, but he is most kind and complimentary • Party a great success

Chapter 10 (November 16th - November 19th)
Reflections • I make another good joke • Am annoyed at the constant serving-up of the blanc-mange • Lupin expresses his opinion of weddings • Lupin falls out with Daisy Mutlar

Chapter 11 (November 20th - November 26th)
We have a dose of Irving imitations • Make the acquaintance of Mr Padge • Don't care for Mr Padge • Mr Burwin-Fosselton becomes a nuisance

Chapter 12 (December 11th - December 23rd)
A serious discussion concerning the use and value of my diary • Lupin's opinion of Christmas • Lupin's unfortunate engagement in on again

Chapter 13 (December 24th - December 31st)
I receive an insulting Christmas card • We spend a pleasant Christmas at Carrie's mothers • A Mr Moss is rather too free • A boisterous evening, during which I am struck in the dark • I receive an extraordinary letter from Mr Mutlar, senior, respecting Lupin • We miss drinking out the old year

Chapter 14 (January 1st - January 26th)
Begin the year with an unexpected promotion at the office • I make two good jokes • I get an enormous rise in my salary • Lupin speculates successfully and starts a pony-trap • Have to speak to Sarah • Extraordinary conduct of Gowing's

Chapter 15 (February 8th - February 11th)
Gowing explains his conduct • Lupin takes us for a drive, which we don't enjoy • Lupin introduces us to Mr Murray Posh

Chapter 16 (February 18th - February 20th)
We lose money over Lupin's advice as to investment, so does Cummings • Murray Posh engaged to Daisy Mutlar

Chapter 17 (March 20th - March 21st)
Marriage of Daisy Mutlar and Murray Posh • The dream of my life realized • Mr Perkupp takes Lupin into the office

Chapter 18 (April 8th - April 23rd)
Trouble with a Sylographic pen • We go to a Volunteer Ball, where I am let in for an expensive supper • Grossly insulted by a cabman • An odd invitation to Southend

Chapter 19 (April 27th - April 29th)
Meet Teddy Finsworth, an old schoolfellow • We have a pleasant and quiet dinner at his uncle's, marred only by a few awkward mistakes on my part respecting Mr Finsworth's pictures • A discussion on dreams

Chapter 20 (May 10th)
Dinner at Franching's to meet Mr Hardfur Huttle

Chapter 21 (May 13th - May 16th)
Lupin is discharged • We are in great trouble • Lupin gets engaged elsewhere at a handsome salary

Chapter 22 (May 26th - June 4th)
Master Percy Edgar Smith James • Mrs James (of Sutton) visits us again and introduces 'Spiritual Sιances'

Chapter 23 (July 1st - July4th)
Lupin leaves us • We dine at Lupin's new apartments, and hear some extraordinary information respecting the wealth of Mr Murray Posh • Meet Miss Lilian Posh • Am sent for by Mr Hardfur Huttle • Important

Chapter the Last (July 10th - July 11th)
One of the happiest days of my life

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